Answer back to all the text I have had xxxx

Hi guys , I'm sorry I have not been blogging to much but I dont think you would read them if I was doing them every other day , but after so many days it funny because I start getting lots of text asking how I am and stuff , so I assume from that I prob should blog a little more often


Over the last week or so I have been struggling with the medication I have been on , when I came out from my nut cracking they gave me steroids to control the swelling around the operation and you are ment to be weened off them over a period of time , well it seams that the consultants do it quite often and try to get you off them too quick which causes come down side effects , like more aches and pains , wobbly legs, and general feeling of crappiness, so after speaking to a community macmillian nurse I have been allocated I have gone back on low dose for longer time and drop down slower.

I have also been struggling with pain in the areas of my secondaries which is normal as I am not on any active treatment. So I really have not been out of the house much and I have just cabbages on the settee in my pjs .

My mac nurse has been fab she has got stuff done for me and we are working to find the right pain killers to control my symptoms till treatment starts.

I have an appointment next week with a lovely man who is head of the radiology unit at the christie to discuss what I'm having to kill the cells in my head , from what I can gather it will be whole brain radiology rather than targeted therapy just to the area where it was , only side effect is lethargy and quite high tiredness . Not sure how many I will have it will be either 5 or 10 session everyday except weekends at the christie for poss around 3/5 mins each session , I think , but I know it's really short,
I may also get some radiology to the area under my arm as that is giving me grief most, radiology is very effective in shrinking area and taking pain away then chemo can stop it growing or wipe it out for a time completely.

So enough of  my medical condition


 We had a nice chilled Xmas and new year with family and now stuff getting back to normal , mike back at work and Olivia back at school.

Otherwise when I'm pain free , I feel good , I have had my nails done , I'm going to get my hair cut tomorrow and hope to get a style that covers my head scar but people I see tell me unless I show them they can't see it as it's really neat and my curly locks blends it's in ,

We also have a fab family weekend lined up in my favourite cityLiverpool this weekend , which includes a meal, two museums  to visit and an American style milkshake to scoff. Plus a trip to primarni I'm sure , much to mikes disgust lol


So do keep texting me but don't get to worried if I don't reply, I'm always on Facebook having a nosey, I will update once I know my treatment plan and how I'm doing on it.

Xxxxxxxxxxx live , love , laugh , xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

One week after nut cracking

well it's a week on and the story is :

This time last week I was unconscious with a nurosurgeon rummaging around in the back of my head taking out a 3 cm tumor, I got in to recovery around 6 , spent 14 in a ward of 4 ladies on 4-6 hours monitoring while being plugged in to saline, they asked us regular question like
Do you know where you are?
What year is it?
What month is it?
 Then the usual obs, blood pressure , temp, checked pupil reaction, only pain killers I was on was paracetamol and codine every 4-6 hours.

I seamed to passed with flying colours because I only spent one day in there then got to go in a private side room with my own bathroom and moved to 6 hourly obs but just in the day. If I needed anything I just pressed the button but by this time I was totally independent by then so I only ever need them if I wanted drugs .

My main goal was to be home before Xmas day, well they let me home after lunch on Monday with a bag of steroids and a few paracetamols that's all I need,

a massive thank you to every one that thought of me during this time and sent me messages, I did see them all but due to my eyes being still quite squiff and blurred I was almost impossible to reply, my eyes are not that much better and are still blurred but I was told they could get worse for a while till the swelling goes done in that area which may be a few weeks but I'm no longer wobbly and unbalanced on my feet wich did get quite bad before my op.

Today I have had 20 pin/ staples taken out out from the back of my head, my scar is quite impressive but as they have not shaved the hair in that area on the initial scabs have gone my hair will cover it and one even know.

It's amazing and I cant get my head around that only 7 days ago I was having a craniotomy and it happened , they told me that were able to get every thing they could see and I will probable need radiotherapy on my head to mop up and cells that may be left , hopefully that will stop it coming back in that area, then it's going to be a form of chemo to hold of the other bits that are in there.

It seams they want to give me similar chemo like I had before, so a chemo then 3 week gap then again on week 4, and I think I will be jessie time again as you hair falls out with radiotherapy any way, not sure which they will do first but they are just leaving me till the new year to recover now, then once they have the results from the testing of the tumour they can decide.



So heres is to the new year and a new road of treatment and hope to result in shrinkage or total blast of the fooker and we are hoping for no evidence detected (NED) with is a possibility if treatment works.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx PMA xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

LIVE  LOVE. LAUGH 

Crack that nut open and bin the bugger

Night before brain op,
 I go in at 7 tomorrow at Salford General , there is only me scheduled by this surgeon and the time span seams to be a few hours including recover from anaesthetic , I will be monitored fro a few hours over the day but I should not be in high dependency or anything like that . Once I am concours and poss eating with out any affects and there is no adverse pressure they will have me down on the ward .

I am till optimistic to be home for Xmas and this is my goal, . As span as I am able to I will post on Facebook or my blog even just to say I'm on my way to the ward.



So see you all on the other side hopefully with a 3 cm less lump and on the way to better vision and no headaches .


Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Riding the Big C Roller Coaster: Hardest blog ever but still positive

Riding the Big C Roller Coaster: Hardest blog ever but still positive: Well here goes You may have noticed I have not blogged for a while , that's because I have been getting on with life. But unfortunate...

Hardest blog ever but still positive

Well here goes
You may have noticed I have not blogged for a while , that's because I have been getting on with life.

But unfortunately the powers that be have decided that they will throw another spanner in the works,
I have been having headaches and funny stuff in my eyes, so mentioned it to my oncologist and was sent for an MRI on my head ,

It's not good news the little fookers have decided to set camp up in my head and have made a camping site 3cm big on the back left which affect vision , only one area for now, which apparently is a good thing I will be having surgery on the 19th as they are confident it can be cut out and then treatment with radiotherapy to mop up the stray cells that may be around  , I have been banned from driving and I'm back on steroids to stop the swelling.
This is classed as stage 4 cancer, they tell me is treatable but not curable .

I had a ct scan to see if they are camping anywhere else and it looks like there is an area on my liver , not sure how big but at moment not causing me any issues, and a spot on my hip bone and a lump under my arm I had my mastectomy on.
These will be treated and hopefully shrunk or stopped from growing by chemo of one for or another, this will be sorted offer my brain op prob in new year.

My new life will now consist or regular scans and treatments tailored to the growth of the tumours.

I have met ladies that have had these ops and have been back at work 3 months later and they have it in other areas of their bodies so are on regular chemo either by IV or tablet, but they are living their lives to the full potential and have been for years.I have found sites where ladies have lived with this 10 years plus, I realise that I will not make a pension age but it is not a guarantee as the amount of new treatment out there coming through is amazing ,

We have know for just over 4 weeks now and we needed this time to understand what this mean for us and what treatment I will be getting, I feel that I have come to terms with
 a lot of this and my view on life is now live every day as it comes, no one know the future weather you are ill or not and it's wasted energy and effort spending time on what ifs and whys, yes we have had some hard conversation but they needed to be said and once out in the open it means they can be
dealt with so that we can get past that and onwards.

I believe even more in positive thinking and that your body and mind can help you battle this .

I am still me , I feel very positive about the surgery and for my future, i will take everything they can throw at me ,I am not ill at all , I feel fit and well and I spend a lot of time doing mindfull thinking and living in the moment.
The past is gone , no one knows the future all you have is the here and now and that is how I will be spending my days.


I will be blogging regular again now, do not be afraid to contact me I still don't bite (I may do after they radiotherapy my head lol) , I still need friends to tell me of their days and troubles and life has not stopped , coffees and meals and drinks ,

LIVE LOVE LAUGH 

My wonky world part 2

I was thinking of changing my blog or starting a new one called my wonky world, as it no longer seam to fit " riding the big c roller coaster" as I am now on a new roller coaster "life after cancer"

It's been 7 week since my mastectomy , I really have no issues with looking at my scar as its my battle wound in a fight where I won. Im Slowly getting used to how to wear my clothes and that I have to carry my handbag on the other arm.
I have to go back to the hospital every week at the moment to get my scar sight drained of fluid build up , but I can't feel it and it only takes 20 mins so no biggie .

As most of you know I'm a people person and where I am not looking to go back to work yet I have been finding it hard spending so much time on my own , when mike and Olivia are out for the day.
I was slipping in to the cant be arsed faze and making my self worse by not even going for a costa,
i started a course of having reflexology at st Luke's and I was offered to join a one off group that they do every month called image workshop, I almost did not go as I really could not be arsed to make the effort, but I did and I really enjoyed it. It was a small group of ladies (5) and it was a talk about makeup, I did not come out with may tips that I did not already know and the make up that she used was not for me , but I met a few wonderful ladies and we had a laugh as chemo side effects and a general chat. What I got out of it was that I need to spend less time on my own and I am back putting makeup on again and being arsed to do stuff again.

I joined a gym last week to try to get my fitness back, plus I have signed up for the race for life in June  ( i have added my link if you would like to sponsor me ) so i need to pull my finger out
I'm also getting a course of hydrotherapy and I had my first one last week, it was fab and it really made a difference to the movement in my arm.

Yesterday I went to work  just to show my face as I do every so often , I went with out my wig on and I also did the school run without it on as well , I'm really pleased I did this but I will not be retiring my jessie yet , 1 its too cold and 2 I just don't think my real hair is girly enough for me yet.

These are all massive mile stone for anyone that has been where I have been and is on the way back up

http://www.raceforlifesponsorme.org/sarahandolivia

HELL YEH

Today I have been to see my surgeon as a follow up after my mastectomy, this appointment is so they can check my scar is healing and give me e results of the test that would have been done one my breast had been taken off on the tumours


So September 2012 I was diagnosed as having two tumours 14cm apart and one measuring 14mm and the other 9 mm

Well today 12th of April 2013 I have been given THE ALL CLEAR the tumours that were taken have already been killed by the chemo and all they had left was scar tissue there were no cancer cells left

Massive smile on my face

So all that feeling of being ill was well worth it, as I have responded to the chemo so well I will not need any further treatment like radiotherapy.

I should be over the moon but me and mike can't quite take it in , over the past 8 months my life has been consumed by cancer , even before if I class my mum in that and now I'm cancer free , ok I have lost my hair and a boob but that has not really fazed me , i have a left arm that i now will have to treat like glass for the rest of my life but for now I just have to get my head around having my life back , which may be a bit harder than you think as I now have no security blanket of the regular treatments , I will get a review every 6 months with the christie and again with Leighton, I will also be looking in to reconstruction in the near future and my possibilities are far greater now I do not have to have radiotherapy,

I will also need to get my head around going back to work , which I really want to do but it's still a massive step

I'm going to have hydrotherapy for my arm movement and I will be starting a group session about moving forward,

But for now and today I will have a little celebration with a big fat pizza and some ice cream ( I will look in to losing my chemo weight one my chest has healed better )

In July I have signed Olivia and I up for the race for life in Manchester Heaton park so I will be hassling you for sponsorship and if you want to join me please feel free.

I AM NOW A SURVIVOR XX oh and my hair is growing back lol