TRAMADOL HAZE

I spent four hour at the christie on Friday having a medical done so I can go on the trial drug they have offered me as we'll as the chemo,
I thought I was only going for a blood test, how wrong was I ,
They took blood and other bodily fluids, poked me , made me sign about 20 times agreeing to all sorts , took temp , blood pressure x-rays, and now sending me off to get an echo on my heart on Monday, but up to know I have passed all the tests, would you believe I am classed a fit and healthy lol
One thing that is has done is made me relise that its getting closer and I'm getting a little bit nervous , I don't think its having the chemo, or even the hair loss, it's the not knowing how sick I'm going to feel, I hate feeling sick , I want to carry on as much as I can , for my family and I don't want this to take over my life , I just want it to be an inconvince for a few days then pull out the other side. Ready for the next dose.
I have decided to shave my head next Saturday as this is the day after my first chemo, the reason behind this is when you have chemo and you hair starts to fall out around day 14 your head becomes that sensitive and your hair falling out hurts, so if I do it before all that starts I have control on how I'm going to feel.
I asked mike but he feels he is not able to do it and that is fine with me , I also want Olivia to help if she wants to .
And before you all start to offer you sadistic load of buggers I already have some one that has jumped in to that space , rather quickly as well now I think about it .......... ???????
Oh back to the tramadol
I asked them for a pain killer that I could use at night as I had had my paracetamol dosage in the day, so they gave me tramadol,
Well I only took a massive 3 over 6 hours and I have felt shit since then , and I think It totally ruined my night last night , I lasted an hour and came home got in my pj,s and went to bed at 10. What a let down , I did feel spaced all day ,
Only just been able to do this as I feel a lot less spaced now , put it this way not bloody taking any more of them.
Picking my wig up next week as well , lets see how often I wear that,
Struggling with tigger today .